Cath came into my life again. She hadn't left entirely, as we'd see each other at various inter agency functions, but at this particular inter agency function, it included an overnight.
Some of my experiences have been marked by this strange ability to delude myself; even as I walked to her room at 11:30 PM, i told myself that nothing would happen. In spite of delving into multiple texts of Buddhism, and a true appreciation for the Four Agreements, i cannot live a fully sincere life.
i think of my mother, who, if there is another side to this world, sits in disappointment or has an understanding beyond us and knows that humans are creatures that take themselves too seriously, and therefore create emotions like envy, jealousy and love as a way to give false weight to our years on earth.
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