My favorite nights are ones that take me by surprise, are redeeming in the subtlest of ways.
A local punk band who has been around since the 80's did a reunion show, along with two other acts with almost the same longevity. i was planning to go, and when a friend with who i have had a couple of dates came by earlier in the week, i asked her if she wanted to go along. Our time together has been fun, but did not enter the romantic realm at all, so i pretty much settled on the fact that it was just friendship.
That night, there i saw people who i hadn't seen in 20 years or more, and others who i hadn't seen since the divorce. That part was a little uncomfortable at first, but not at all, especially when one of ExA's friends approached me warmly.... i truly enjoyed seeing her. However, i felt bad for Seraph, who, at the age of 24, was a toddler when we saw this band emerge. When i said that i was sorry that she had to hang out with a bunch of older people reliving their past, she smiled and told me to stop apologizing, and i believed her.
We went out on the back deck and talked while drizzle came down and gray settled on the water. The night was misty and chilly, but our conversation flowed and i found myself looking at her face with such fascination, such longing, it surprised me.
The show was incredible- i hadn't danced that energetically in a long time- and we left early because i knew that i wanted more time with Seraph.
We talked and kissed for hours.
My relationship life is marked by moments where i have felt saved, understood, naked... i thought i would never have that again. Tonight, i felt it again, and i loved the blood that rushed in me, no longer felt as if it was a traitor.
