Frustrating is the situation where a person deludes herself so much that even the truth will not set her free.
KT and i spent time together last night after not speaking for about five weeks; the last time was when she appeared at my home, drunk, at 1:30 AM and tried to convince me that she was not there for a hook up. After initial trepidation i found myself comfortable being with her and moments arose that reminded me why I liked her in the first place.
My mind went back and forth about whether or not i would succumb to the sexual, but it seemed moot as the night went on and she spoke of another man. i was wrong, and once it became clear that i could own the moment, i jumped in whole hearted.
Then the after shit came, as it always does. She wants so badly to see the last 14 months as special, and that in spite of what i have said, she believes that i did at one time love her. She does it in a joking manner, as if to circumvent my protests.
You were just a way to get out of my marriage. i exaggerated affection for you, based on a initial attraction, not unlike my marriage.
It's so sad, and realize that no amount of great sex is worth having to listen to her go one and one about how special we were/are.
